Monday, August 4, 2014

Work manners and humour, level: FMCG


Following is an opinion, an obviously personal one. I do not claim any expertise on the field or the subject matter and anyone who chooses to be guided by a blog rather than facts and hard sought knowledge, deserves truly, what it shall bring upon him.

Psychology journals classify humour as one of the efficient coping mechanisms for short-term setbacks and hardships in life. Budding CEOs and marketers of the world, fresh from B-schools, often use it to cope up with their sales stints when they join sales and marketing roles in FMCG companies.

Getting Around: Do not curse the fact that you will have to be a pillion to a direct sales rep (DS), while visiting the markets. Wait until the bike goes away, and you have to cover the market for hours on foot. Wait, did you ask for some conveyance again?  Ah, now you will have to do with the cycle! Or wait, till he takes you round for a trip in a local bus and the thing takes a sharp right turn… .Passenger trains are just fine though. More often than not, you can find yourself a place to sit on the luggage rack, if you are proactive enough.

Salesmen usually carry a big bag full of merchandising stuff, samples etc. in the field. That huge bag will occupy a lot of space on the bike, leaving lesser room for the pillion-you in this case. Keep it that way. You do not want that bag removed from between you two, given the bumpy ride. Think about it.

Best time to visit: Tragedy is to carry out the stint in the sweltering temperatures of 42 degrees in Delhi. Comedy is when it gets to rain and you realize your firm has no on-ground umbrella or raincoat policy, and the norm is to do the market anyways.

Hospitality: Every shop has a mayur jug of water and 2 glasses. If the owner asks the boy in the shop to serve you water in one of those glasses, it is a gesture of respect and courtesy. Accept it. Do not think about x number of people who have used the glass since morning, or about the boy’s dusted fingers holding the glass from the rim, or about the visible nothings floating on the water’s surface. The unspoken rule of the land is that rinsing the glass once is enough to wash it off of its previous users’ leftovers. Accept it and drink it and move on.

What to eat: An integral part of these stints is to share a meal with your DS. You may share a drink or smoke with him too, but this is where perhaps gender comes in. These stints are all about banana shakes, samosa chhole, chai and bread pakodas. I personally had to forget my love for English breakfast and earl grey tea for a while, as the distributors ordered special chai and thanda for ‘Madam’ from one town to next. From special ghevar of samlkha, to pakoras of bahadurgarh, to jalebi of gohana, to tikki of gannaur, to special ghee and gur shops – in India, outside cities, you are in for a treat!

Local language: It is not so much about learning the language, as about learning to accept the language. “10 peti laga do”, “rate kese failaya hai”, “market bigad di”, “maal thok do”, you get the idea.  And yes, do download the app for hindi number counting.

Local Culture: When it is hot, people scratch. The people you will be dealing with will be scratching their bellies, their face, their legs and what not all the time. Which is ok, because as you stand scratching your head calculating margins, schemes, landing rates etc. in his shop; you pose quite an amusing picture to him too.

Sight Seeing: One often looses enthusiasm to carry on with the sales calls from one shop to next given the strenuous nature of the work and the heat. A good way to revive is to look out for the young lads sitting in these shops – the 17-year-old son of the shopkeeper. Sitting clad with spiked hair, denims and his smart phone, he would anywhere be in this world than sitting in his father’s kirana shop. Derive sadistic pleasure from him. Wink at your own risk.

Budget: Alls well, that pays well.

Now that sophistication has been formally ousted from my life, here is a song quite different from the blues and jazz I have been putting up earlier. It is dedicated to my recent sales stint in Haryana, with its small neat towns, the peace-lack of noise pollution, delicious water, local sweets and delicacies, warm hospitality, the long and windy roadways bus journeys and its guys, one in particular, blessed naturally with strong jawlines for adding aesthetic beauty to my stints.







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